Yesterday I got a taste of what Jon has been doing 3-4 mornings a week. Here is my interpretation. The alarm goes off at 4:45am. Next I force my tired body into lots of layers including long-underwear, fleece, and various styles of camouflage. I stumble to the kitchen and get my first dose of coffee, pull on knee high rubber boots, and jump in the car. Fifteen minutes later I am knee-high in the Mississippi fighting with a 14' boat in a fierce northwest wind. I squeeze into the front of the boat next to 2 dozen duck and geese decoys, leftover feathers from not-so-lucky guests, and boxes of bullets. We bounce across the open water. I yell at Jon when the waves come overboard and spray my still half-asleep body. Jon laughs at this situation (the nerve!). Once we get to our "spot", I start unwinding the decoy cords while Jon strategically places each of them in front of our blind. We shove the boat into the weeds and throw Jon's homemade blind canopy over us. For the first time, we can relax. We position the life jackets on the floor of the boat and take a 20 minute nap together (Jon's version of romance in a duck boat). At 7am our guns are loaded. By now I have had my second dose of coffee and am feeling alert enough to hold a loaded weapon. At 7:05am Jon is cursing the hunters across the channel who are illegally shooting before 7:15am (1/2 hour before sunrise). For the next 2 hours we shoot at ducks within range as they head down the Mississippi, on their way to greener winter pastures. I miss every duck I aim at; the ducks are lucky that I am holding a gun. At one point, I unload three shells at a flock and the third shot nearly propels me overboard. Jon's camouflage canopy is the only thing that keeps me out of the Hell Diver's Club (Jon's name for folks who go swimming during the hunting season). By 9am we have had enough. I complete the above process in reverse, minus the napping on the life jackets and call it a day...all before 10am!
